Two things I don’t like: 1) being dizzy; and 2) being cold. Today I am both dizzy and cold, which indeed has been my situation much of the past week. Our geothermal cannot cope with this sub-zero situation and I’m now in bed wearing my L L Bean expedition weight base layer, compression socks, wool socks, fleece jacket, etc. It’s a bit frisky in here. To top it off, I have had a rough week viz. dizziness.
It started a full week ago when I was out for a fitness walk with Ben. I’ve been fitness walking a lot recently, trying to get functional enough that I can walk around Paris (!!) in the spring. Paris is very motivating. I do not want to be in Paris and in bed with my head under a pillow, as has so often been the case in recent days. Anyway, so I was out walking on the beautiful and totally flat towpath, and thought that given the flatness and the fact that I had Ben with me, I could up the distance from 2.5 miles to a solid three. This went along fine until suddenly around the half way point I started getting the tunnel vision, the spots, and feeling extremely certain that being horizontal was my best alternative to out and out fainting. It was deserted, thankfully, and we found a bench. I lay down and Ben (god bless him!) assisted by elevating my feet, which I’m sure would’ve looked absurd to passing humans, but luckily the ducks and blue herons didn’t seem too appalled.
After a while I was able to walk again and we made it back to the car. I got through the day okay, then Sat. had to spend a couple hours under my pillow. Elias got this toy which shrieked like a banshee and I was alone with him much of the afternoon. A few minutes in Cosmic Bowling (dark with flashing lights, blaring music, gleeful children, and, yes, bowling sounds) did not help. But my good friend intervened before it got too bad, and said I could go home and she would bring Elias home for me! Thanks so much L.!! Then Sunday had a horrible time coping with church and then had to spend a full six hours under my pillow afterwards. Monday I had to function and sort of did. I think Tuesday was okay. But then Wednesday I was meeting Ben at a Bob Evans and encountered this ridiculous parking lot that seemed to me like it was on a fun-house sort of slope. I nearly fell trying to deal with that f***ing slope and then spent the rest of the day feeling like I was on a ship at sea, just like the bad old days! Motion sick on a stationary couch. Yesterday I did many errands while medium-dizzy, including the BMV. While taking the kids to their music lessons, I had that horrible, familiar sensation of being unable to walk down a fully stable straight hallway and worrying that people would think I was actually intoxicated.
This. Sucks.
Today dawned with me almost falling in the dark as I tried to make it to the alarm clock, and has been a struggle ever since. Ben stepped into the breach with again excellent husbandry, and took the kids to school for me, and went and got my medication refills. I got on the phone with my neurologist, begging for succor. What they can do in this case is maybe give me a round of steroids to try to knock this brain of mine back into submission.
I think it may be the weather– my POTS friends online all across the upper midwest are all having a f**ked up week too!
So I now will entertain and cheer myself up with a cup of hot peppermint tea and writing an amusing blog entry about something else pathetic and physical that happened a few months ago. I’ll post it separately and hope it will make you and me laugh and otherwise brighten what is not a nice day by many other metrics.
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